Slave Breakup - My Experience III   (06/23/99)
	This post was written by Argentium, moonlight's owner and operator. moonlight wrote: I asked him what he would do if I came and said "I want to do this, but you're going to have to order me to." I don't remember exactly, but it was something to the effect of "I want you to try X, and we'll see what happens." Not looking for a specific conclusion or action. Just an order to try and that *any* attempt at trying would be a success, no matter how it worked out in the end. Where the goal is to see what the result of an honest 'try' is, rather than to try to predict the outcome of such an experiment. moonlight wrote: The key things here, though, are that it is something that he cannot evaluate for me. Nope, nor would I want to. moonlight wrote: It has to come from me. And that if there *would* be an order, assuming condition 1, that there would not have to be a "successful" outcome. Or, rather, that *any* outcome would be successful. Or more correctly, there is no push towards any predicted outcome. These are dice that are better left unloaded. :-) Some might ask why I have no desire to push moonlight into the position of trying prior to her expressing an interest. Some might view that as a weakness as a top/dominant/master/whatever. To those, I would humbly submit that it sometimes takes more strength of character to recognize where one shouldn't go and more importantly _why_, than to proceed boldly forth, regardless of consequences. In actuality, I have first hand personal knowledge of consequences that can result from the exact scenario being discussed. I'm not proud of my stupid decisions at the time, and I'm not about to repeat them knowing that they can result in significant psychological harm to both myself and others. Even if harm wasn't a significant possibility, but the outcome didn't yield anything positive: Why do it then? I'm not personally fond of exercises in futility. For me, it's all about _appropriate_ growth...