Gregory started the CD over before he walked back to me with that look on his face. That look that told me that I *was* going to do something whether I wanted to or not. Without saying anything, he pulled the soft leather blindfold over my eyes. After putting me where he wanted, his hands slowly slid the leotard I was wearing off, leaving me standing there in nothing but a pair of stockings and elbow gloves.
I could feel him buckle the cuffs around my wrists and hook them to the chains to either side of me, so that my arms were raised and extended over my head and fully stretched. Everyone in the room was silent, making my nerves even worse. What if they were laughing? Or disgusted? Or what if they were bored because this was my first time in public and I couldn't do as much as some of the other people that had played there? I could feel the cool air brushing across me as I strained to hear anything over the music.
All I could hear was Gregory moving away from me and then come back to stand behind me. Then there came the soft caress of the satin flogger. It was a brightly colored one, made from exquisitely soft satin curtain cord, and was one of my favorites since it could pack quite a thud. But that wasn't how he used it now. Now he used it with a soft swirl that was meant to caress and help me to find the music. That driving beat that I needed to help me relax into this. I could feel the insistent pull that Gregory was making, telling me to let go with the soft touch of the satin.
And slowly, I did. Slowly the music took over and pulled me into myself and back out again, letting me forget about the people in the room with us. Letting me forget about everything but the music, and myself, and my Master.
As the music changed, so did the flogger. This time to one of suede. Still soft, but with more of a bite and sting to it than the other. Without thinking, my hands clenched and unclenched around the chains as the sting started to drive me further in and out still. I could feel that soft floating feeling that comes from playing with Gregory when he pushes me into such a space. It's like sitting and feeling, yet feeling nothing, like you're two people all rolled into one.
And then the pain came. The sweet pain from still another flogger. This one made by me for my master. A hard thong flogger that's had the tails braided and beaded. One that he had not used on me before, because I had felt that I was not ready for that kind of pain, that I didn't *like* that kind of pain.
In the back part of my head, I could hear someone saying what sounded like "Yes. *DO* it." Or perhaps it was me in my head. By that time I could not have coherently answered anything anyway. Who is to say that I wasn't saying that, even if there *was* someone saying it in the room?
And then the pain stopped. Turned into that soft caressing again, calling me back home to myself, to my love......to my friends.
***Later at Home***
Later, as we walked into his apartment, there was a change in both of us. We could both feel it. He turned off the lights as I lay down on the bed. Before I could say anything, he was quickly stripping my clothes off, and pushing my legs apart.
I was still sort of fuzzy from earlier in the evening, but the feel of him pressing into me was something that never fails to bring a response, no matter what the situation. Almost before we had started, his hand found my neck and pressed deep into the sides of my neck over the jugular and starting my blood to pounding.
An almost feral growl came from his throat as he started thrusting deep enough to hurt. I could feel the pressure building in my head as my vision started to darken slightly before he released my neck and climbed off of me.
I lay there gasping and writhing until he grabbed me and roughly flipped me over, pulling me up to my hands and knees. My head dropped onto my arms until his hand wound into my hair and pulled my head sharply back. His voice was a deep growl in my ear as he raked his nails over my back, saying, "Do you like that, bitch? Do you like me to choke the life out of you? *Do* *you*?" With that he pulled sharply back on my hair as he quickly dragged his belt around my neck with the other hand and shoved back into me.
My hands clawed in terror at the bed beneath me at the new way that he was doing this. This that we had never talked about. But my trust was enough to carry me through. And the feelings that he was creating were incredible. The desperation and terror that I longed for sometimes, and the submission. Oh...the submission. But most of all was the love. That he would do this for me, make me feel all this.
Letting go of my hair, he placed both hands on the belt and pulled them evenly back as he took his pleasure. My hands quickly became claws as they tore at the bed, my body wanting a way out, a way to get more air. And I could feel the blackness coming quicker this time.....and the air going faster as I struggled harder than I had with just his hand.
In the end, I could feel the utter desperation to get away, the need for air as my body fell forward on the bed. And the lovely feeling of him finding his pleasure as I slipped into the blackness and finally let go.
I woke to the feel of his hand slapping across my face and a deep purr coming out of my chest as he wrapped himself around me and kissed my cheek, telling me to rest and that he loved me more than anyone or anything. More than life itself.
I love you to, sweet Master, mine. *grin* More than chocolate.
